Chapter 23
EXPERIMENTS
"Joe, could you escort Dr. Krell and whoever he has with him
into the building?" Jim asked.
"Sure," Joe replied. He quickly left the room and walked back
to the entrance.
By now Joe was at home enough with his new physique and the
feel of his clothes that he sometimes forgot, if only for just a
moment, that his appearance had changed significantly. As he
traveled the familiar hallways, he absent-mindedly attempted to
move along with the long, easy stride he always used. When he did,
he felt the restricting hem of the skirt at his knees. He looked
down, and was instantly reminded that some things were quite
different now. He could feel the slight bounce of his breasts
moving, and hear the gentle rustle of his pantyhose when his thighs
sometimes rubbed together as he walked. Joe placed his hand on his
hip just to feel the satin slickness of the slip against his
stockings. He liked the sensation and kept his hand there, letting
it gently brush the side his leg as he walked. There were so many
interesting things about being this way... wearing clothes like
these... always some new feeling or sensation to experience. To be
like this forever wouldn't be so bad at all, he thought.
When he arrived at the entrance, Joe recognized Dr. Krell,
Karen Simpson, and two other people, both men, probably doctors or
lab technicians. He didn't recognize either of them. Dr. Krell
smiled in recognition when he spotted Joe. Karen raised her hand
in greeting.
"Good morning, Dr. Krell," Joe said. "Hi, Karen," He added.
"Good morning," Dr. Krell repeated. "How are you doing this
fine day, Joe?"
"Just fine, I guess," Joe said, smiling.
"You're certainly looking good," Karen said.
"Thanks. You are too." Joe said.
They all signed the log, and Dr. Krell introduced the other
two men. "Joe Bates, I'd like you to meet Dr. John Schwab and Dr.
Richard Roberts. Besides their talents, they're associates of
mine. John is into genetics research, and Dick's specialty is
urology, and they're both very interested in what's happened here.
If it turns out our research continues very long, I'm sure we'll
have others wanting to get involved on it too."
"I've heard all about you," Dr. Schwab said, holding out his
hand to Joe.
Somewhat embarrassed, Joe shook his hand, and then took the
hand of Dr. Roberts.
"I've got to talk with you," the big, friendly looking guy
said. "What has happened to you is almost unbelievable. I can
hardly believe my eyes."
"Well believe me, nobody's having a harder time believing I'm
like this than I am myself."
"If you'll follow me, I'll take you to the others. Jim
Matheney, he's our Certification Manager and my boss. I guess he's
your primary contact here at Honeybone."
"This is quite an impressive complex," Dr. Roberts said.
"I've always wanted to see how avionics are designed."
"Do you have an interest in aviation?" Joe asked.
"Yeah, I guess I do," Dr. Roberts said. "I've got my commer-
cial ticket, and a five year old A-36 Bonanza."
"That's a pretty good plane," Joe commented.
"I guess you get all kinds of interesting hardware around
here," the doctor said.
"Well, sometimes we get a new airframe to use, but usually we
have to use our test aircraft, and they're hardly new," Joe said.
"But we do work with the latest in avionics, of course."
"I have King gear in mine," Dr. Roberts said. "I have to
admit, except for the DME, I haven't had any real trouble with any
of it yet."
They arrived at the Certification Section offices, and Joe led
them into Jim's office, where the others were waiting. He
introduced them to each other, noting that the two new doctors
carefully eyed Mike, Dave, and Tim as they were introduced.
"All of you were together when this happened?" Dr. Schwab
asked, looking at Mike.
"Well, we were pretty near each other for some of the time."
Mike answered. "Three of us were in the Lear, and Tim here, came
over to fuel us and stayed around to watch us calibrate. I guess
that's really the only time we were actually together for any
length of time."
"And this GPS transmitter, was it on all the time?" Dr.
Roberts asked.
"Once we turn it on, it stays on all the time. We were really
close to the 'A.' The 'B' was located at the other side of the
airport. Joe and I were the only ones really close to that one
while it was turned on," Mike explained.
"What kinds of power do those transmitters operate at?" Dr.
Roberts queried.
"Well, it's adjustable over a considerable range," Mike said.
"I've got records of the settings used last Thursday, or any other
day, for that matter."
"So this thing has been used before?" Dr. Roberts asked.
"Oh, sure. We've been testing receivers for more than a
month," Joe chimed in.
"But you've only now had a problem?" the doctor asked.
"If there was anything happening to me before last week, I
certainly didn't realize it," Joe said. "Friday morning came as a
complete surprise, that's for sure," he added.
"Same here," Dave said.
"Likewise," Mike added. "In fact, when I first realized
something strange was happening... that I was changing, or
whatever... I hadn't really changed very much yet, but I could feel
something, like an itch or something, before I could see any
change. Actually, I'm pretty sure I'm still changing, but it's
happening slower now."
"Yeah. Same here," Tim said. "When I got home Thursday night,
I felt really terrible. I couldn't sleep, my chest felt so
strange, and I had a really bad upset stomach. I was just lying
there in bed when I first realized that something really peculiar
was happening. First, I just had to go to the bathroom really bad.
I went to pee and that's when I saw that my cock... er, my penis
was shrinking or something... anyway, it was really hard to go...
to pee with it pulled in like that, but it felt like I really had
to, so I did. Afterwards, I went back to bed, but I could still
feel it... it was sort of tingling and felt really strange, like it
was trying to pull up further inside me. It continued that way
until it was completely gone, it feels like it's up inside...
changed to the way it is now. I guess I can still feel it there
when I think about it. But I suppose I am sort of getting used to
it this way."
Tim started to touch himself, but then he realized everyone
was watching and stopped, looked embarrassed, but then continued
speaking.
"I really didn't know what the hell was going on. I mean it
couldn't be real, maybe I was just dreaming. I didn't realize I
was... I guess... turning into a girl until I got up again, early
in the morning, and saw just what I looked like in the mirror. Of
course, even then I didn't completely realize what had happened.
My boobs hadn't grown that much by then, and I guess I didn't
realize the full extent of what had happened to me until sometime
the next morning... I mean... it's easy to look and see what's
happened now, but I'm telling you there is no way to prepare
yourself for something like this. I mean, I never heard of
anything like it before." His soft voice rose and fell as he
described what it was like to watch his body undergo the changes
that had affected each of them.
As Joe listened to Tim describe what had happened to him,
he decided that maybe it was better to go through the change like
he did, sleeping through the whole thing. He didn't even know that
anything had happened until he woke up. Actually to see it
happening and to feel it. No wonder Tim hid in his apartment for
days rather than face other people the way he was. How do you
explain something like that happening to you?
The doctors listened to Tim's story with interest.
"I've read your file." Dr. Schwab said. "But your description
of the experience really brings out the trauma. I'm not sure what
has happened exactly, and I'm certainly amazed that something like
this could happen overnight, much less at all."
"As long as you guys can figure a way to get us back, I don't
care if you can explain it or not," Dave said.
"Why don't we go and look over the test cage?" Jim suggested.
"We have everything that was used on Thursday set up, and we're
ready for whatever experiments you might want to try."
"Good idea." Dr. Krell answered, and looked at Joe to lead
them to the lab.
Joe looked at the little doctor. "Follow me," he said.
He led them down the hall and opened the double doors, holding
them open while the others went inside.
"It's larger than I thought it would be," Dr. Schwab ex-
claimed. "We could try a number of experiments at the same time
with this much room."
"How will we know how much power to use at this close range?"
Dr. Roberts wondered aloud.
"I suggest we start with very low power, then increase it in
small increments, never exceeding the settings used outdoors. The
whole system can take full transmitter power, but maybe it wouldn't
be a good idea to use it all, no matter if we get the desired
results or not. It's really close quarters for that much power,
and I doubt that it would help anyway," Jim suggested. He was
always concerned about safety, since he was responsible for safety
in the lab.
"We will defer to your judgment on that, Mr. Matheney," Dr.
Krell said.
"Please call me Jim, Doctor."
"Sure Jim, and of course, please feel free to call me Ben,"
Dr. Krell said, smiling.
"I'll try to remember that," Jim said. He was very serious
about work, but liked informality among professionals during
operations like this. Of course, there had never been operations
like this before.
"What do you have planned?" Mike asked, his curiosity hard to
contain.
"Well, now that we know what we have to work with I think we
have room for primates. I thought we would have to use mice, but
this is much better. We could even use human volunteers, when we
get to that point," Dr. Roberts said.
"I volunteer for that whenever you want to try it," Dave
chimed in.
"I'm afraid that we would need a control subject for the first
attempt," Dr. Roberts said. "But you will probably get your chance
too." He smiled.
"It can't be too soon," Dave said.
The men looked over the equipment, and at the lab in general,
appearing to be concerned about the size of the unused space. They
murmured to themselves, and then walked over to where Jim and Joe
were standing and watching.
"I think this will be enough room," Dr. Krell said. "We'll
need room for some cages, if we are to bring some lab animals in.
I think we can have some of what we need here by this afternoon,
tomorrow for sure."
"What will we need to do today?" Joe asked. He was curious
what they would be doing.
"Well, I think these two gentlemen would like to interview
each of you," Dr. Krell said. "Perhaps you could come over to
Hillcrest, to my office there, for a while this morning?"
"Sure. I can do that," Joe said. Oh damn, more hospital, he
thought. He was anxious to see what they would be doing in the
lab, not answering questions, or getting examined.
"I think we need to get to a telephone," Dr. Krell said.
"Right here," Jim said. "This desk and this phone are
available for your use. Please make yourself at home."
Dr. Krell sat down and picked up the handset. Dr. Roberts
walked over to Joe and the others. "Do you all think you could
meet me over at Hillcrest in about two hours?" he asked. "It
shouldn't take very long, but I do have some things... some
questions to ask. I think it would be best to do that over there."
"A couple of hours? Sure," Dave responded. "Will we be
coming back here then?" He was impatient with the seemingly slow
progress.
"I don't think there will be any need for that," Dr. Roberts
said. "Maybe tomorrow afternoon, but not before. We have a lot of
setting up to do in here till then. There is no reason for any of
you to get involved with that. We'll have a number of assistants
taking care of it."
Joe was hoping to get some "hands on" of the equipment
himself, but he was beginning to see that the plan was to sort of
let them "be involved," but probably not use their expertise. They
were now simply part of the experiment, as far as the doctors were
concerned.
They went back to the offices, and Joe went directly to his
desk. Karen was with them and Tim, since he had no where else to
go, followed Joe and Dave. Joe looked at Karen, trying to tell if
she had any idea of what was happening. "So what now?" he asked.
"Do we just sit and wait till they call us?"
"I suppose that's all there is to do," Karen said. "Of
course, it's only about an hour and forty-five minutes till you
need to be at Hillcrest."
"Oh, yeah. I almost forgot about that," Joe replied. "I
wonder what that's going to be about?"
"I'm not sure, really," Karen surmised. "But I overheard the
discussion, and I think they are still trying to determine the full
extent of the changes your chromosomes have undergone. They can't
understand how this could have happened in such a short period. It's starting to become obvious that it isn't really over
yet, since you all seem to be still changing, at least a little,
don't you agree?"
Joe looked at Karen. "I didn't know it was that obvious. How
can you tell?"
Karen smiled. "I'm not sure really. Mike, of course, is the
most noticeable; it's easy to see that he's still developing. Joe,
you and Tim, I guess it's different. It's not so physical, but
more in the way you act and the way you talk. I can tell you both
becoming more familiar with what has happened."
"I guess I am getting a little used to it." Joe said. "But
it's more than that, I can't explain it. It's like my brain is
changed or something. Hell, I think I'm even beginning to like
being like this, like it's the way I'm supposed to be. Until a
couple of days ago, all I could do was think about figuring out how
to get back, try to hold on to my masculinity, I guess. Now, I
don't care about that anymore. I guess it's taken over my head or
something. I can't really explain it."
"Yeah. I think it's the same for me, at least a little," Tim
said. "At first I hated this, but I guess I'm beginning to accept
it all now."
"How about you, Dave?" Karen asked.
"Is it really important how I feel?" Dave said sullenly. "I
can't just decide that I'm going to be a girl, even if I happen to
look like one, or whatever."
"Even you can't change what's happened," Karen said. "If you
try to go against your feelings, it will just make you unhappy and
hard to be around, and won't change a thing. I'm speaking from
personal experience."
Just then, Jim Matheney walked from his office and came over
to Tim. "Can you come with me for a few minutes?" he asked.
"Sure," Tim answered, and followed Jim back to his office.
Jim closed the door.
"This has all just got to be temporary," Dave said. "Even if
I would get used to this, I still have to change back."
"Maybe you do," Joe said. "But before that, why don't you try
to lighten up?" He tried to cheer up his pal, who seemed to be
depressed.
"What do you want me to do, Joe?" Dave asked. "Buy a bunch of
dresses, or something?"
"Hey, I don't know what you want, but you must have something
you'd like to try, I mean, I know you're curious. Why don't you
kick back a little, and try to enjoy what has happened, rather than
fight it all the way. Like Karen said, you've become a Sad Sack,
and it isn't helping you, or your family. Whatever happens
tomorrow, why don't you try to enjoy today?" Joe tried to sum up
what he had wanted to say to Dave for some time.
Dave grinned at his friend. "I'm sorry if I've become a pain
in the ass. You know that's not the way I am."
"Yeah, I know that," Joe replied, grinning. "That's why I've
put up with it till now."
"So what should I do?" Dave asked.
"What would you like to do? How do you feel about yourself?"
"I don't know, exactly." Dave answered. "I guess I'm having
some of the same feelings you are, I don't know. It's hard to know
what I feel like."
Joe knew what his friend meant. Even if he was starting to
accept himself the way he was, Joe also experienced the strange
paradox. Sure, he looked like a female now, and he was even
beginning to like how he looked, as well as the feminine feelings
he was experiencing. At least that's what he figured they were.
He didn't really know what it was supposed to feel like to be
female, he only knew what HE felt like. But even though he liked
it a lot, he still felt like he was male, deep inside. There was
just no way he could change his past. Until a week ago, everything
he did, his every thought, was naturally from the male perspective.
That was hard and maybe impossible to change. The sensation was
sometimes as if his changed body was somehow not really his, that
he was inside somebody else, even though he knew that was not the
case. Sometimes, he still felt pretty much like a guy, and
sometimes the new feeling of femininity almost overwhelmed him.
Karen Simpson joined them. "It looks like they won't need you
guys here today. When you leave for Hillcrest, let me know. I
need to go over there, too."
Joe looked at Dave. "Are we ready to go over there?"
"Yeah, I guess so, not that I'm looking forward to getting
prodded and poked again."
"I don't think there will be much of that." Karen said. "Then
again, I don't know what Dr. Roberts might have on his mind."
"Let's go find Mike." Joe said. I guess Tim is getting a job
offer, he thought. "We can wait for Tim. I'll try to track Mike
down."
Joe went out in the hallway. He wondered where the big woman
might be. Mike was with them in the lab, and came back out with
them, but then he was suddenly gone. He looked into the offices
and cubicles along the way as he toured the hallways. When he came
to the word processing area, he could see Mike's new hairpiece over
the top of the partition. What was he doing in here, he thought?
He went over to Mike, who was talking with an
attractive young woman, Melody Meyers, whom he recognized as having
gone out with Mike in the past. Mike must have seen her in the
hall, and is trying to explain. Joe thought. It was hard. Yeah,
sure, it's still me. Joe had gone through the same thing with
Linda. It was impossible not to be embarrassed to have to try to
explain to your girl friend that something like this had happened
to you. First they didn't believe it, and then if you could
convince them, they felt sorry for you and wanted to help. At
least that's the way it had been for him and Linda. He didn't
really know the extent of the relationship that Mike had with
Melody.
Mike saw him when he turned the corner.
"Hi Joe. Here, Mel, see, this is Joe Bates. You know him.
He's had the same thing happen, too," Mike explained to a wide eyed
Melody.
"Oh, God. I heard the rumors that something like this had
happened, but I thought it was a strange joke. But I see it's
really true," Melody said, leaning back in her swivel chair.
"Yeah, I guess it's really true," Joe said, smiling at the
attractive young woman. He didn't really know her, but he had
often noticed her in the hall. She was easily one of the best
looking girls in word processing, and he always noticed the good
looking girls. As he eyed her, he realized that they were probably
almost the same size now. Even their figures were very similar.
Hell, they could probably share clothes.
"Well, I'm sorry for you both, and the others too," Melody
said. "Are you having problems, or anything?"
Joe looked at her. "I don't know about the others, but I
guess I'm getting used to it, the best I can anyway. It's a heck
of a change to wake up looking like this." He smiled.
"I just can't believe it." Melody said. "You both look so
natural. You look just like real women. That skirt looks
positively marvelous on you, Joe."
"We've been told that we more than LOOK like 'real' women,"
Joe added. "I think we have all the required parts, inside and
out. It certainly feels like we do anyway." He grinned at Melody
as he rubbed his hand along the soft curve of his right breast.
Even though he looked, and now felt, quite female, he still had a
weakness for pretty girls. Perhaps not like before. It was much
more subtle now. But it was making for strange conversation. He
tried to change the subject.
"We're going to go over to Hillcrest now," Joe told Mike.
"Are you ready?"
"Yeah, I guess so," Mike said. He looked back at Melody.
"I'll call you tonight, all right?" he asked. "We can talk about
it."
"Ok. Sure," Melody answered. "Good luck. You too, Joe."
"Thanks," Joe said as he turned, and began to walk away. He
was aware that the other women were looking at him and Mike as they
walked passed them. He understood their curiosity, and smiled at
them as he passed. So these are my new peers. He thought to
himself. I think this will take some time.
When Joe and Mike arrived back at Joe's desk, Tim was sitting
in the chair beside it. He was obviously pleased about something.
He and Dave were engaged in conversation, and Dave continued to
speak as Joe arrived at his desk and sat down.
"Yeah, but I'll be willing to bet that over the course of your
entire life, you'll find your earning power reduced. I don't care
who you end up working for," Dave said.
Dave was giving the young man, who, like him, was now a young
woman, his opinion of life as a female. Tim obviously did not
completely agree with his older friend.
"I think it depends on the individual," Tim objected. "If I'm
qualified to do the same work, I should earn the same income."
"Let me know when you arrive on earth," Dave said sarcastical-
ly.
"Joe, what's your opinion?" Tim asked. "Dave thinks that our
lifetime earning power will be reduced if we decide to stay this
way."
"Hell, I don't have any idea." Joe said. "I suppose women do
earn less, on the average than men, but I think there are many
reasons for that. I'm not sure that all those reasons would ever
apply to us, considering our unusual backgrounds."
"Well, let's get going," Karen said as she came walking down
the hall, and saw them all together.
"Do you want to ride with me?" Joe asked her. "No need to
take both cars, is there?" He didn't mind company on the short
drive to the hospital.
"Ok. I'll be glad to," Karen said. "I don't know if we'll
need to come back here or not, but it's more or less on the way
anyway, isn't it."
"No problem." Joe replied as they walked down the hall.
They got in his car and buckled in. Joe drove to the hospital
and didn't say a word. Karen spoke first. "I was listening to
them discuss your problem. I don't think they have any idea as to
what has happened to you guys, or what to do about it."
"Do you think that means we're stuck like this?"
"It's hard to say." Karen looked over at Joe. "Would you
mind?"
Joe grinned. It must really be obvious that he was beginning
to enjoy his new gender. "I don't know how I should answer that.
Sure, it seems to be getting easier each day. I have to admit, I
guess I'm starting to like it. But I really haven't experienced
everything yet, have I?" He gave Karen a questioning look.
"You are more female than I will ever be. I'd give anything
to have what you were given by accident."
"And I wish I could give it all to you," Joe said honestly.
"I guess I'm getting used to it, maybe even starting to like it,
but I really hadn't figured I'd be spending my whole life as a
girl...a woman. Maybe I'm just starting to realize what it all
might mean."
"Joe, it's hard to change your gender, even when that's what
you want more than anything else in the world. I am impressed at
how your dealing with this all. All of you are simply amazing in
how well you're handling it," Karen said, the admiration in her
voice showing through.
"If it was as hard as the first day, I know I wouldn't be
taking it this well," Joe admitted. "But something, some chemical
or hormonal change or something is affecting me, my head. That's
actually making it all pretty easy. I'm actually starting to like
it now. I really can't explain what I mean."
"When I started hormone therapy I noticed a feeling like that,
too," Karen said. "I thought I wanted to be female more than
anything else, but when I started therapy, in a few months I KNEW
I was female. I felt like a woman, even before I started to look
like one. Of course, after the surgery, the feelings really kicked
in. I guess you got both barrels at once." She grinned.
"I don't know," Joe said. "But right now, I don't know if I
could even handle being a man anymore. It just feels too good this
way."
"Yeah. Yeah, it does, doesn't it," Karen said with a knowing
smile.
They arrived at Hillcrest Hospital and Joe drove into the
parking area. They quickly walked the short distance to the office
that Dr. Krell maintained there. Karen went to her desk, and Joe
sat in one of the seats nearby. Soon the others followed,
taking seats next to Joe.
"I wonder what they want now?" Tim asked.
"I don't have any idea," Joe said. "But I guess the more
doctors we have working with us the faster we'll find the answer."
"Yeah, but what will it be?" Dave asked, speaking to no one in
particular.
They were sitting only about fifteen minutes when Joe heard
his name called. He went up to the window, where Karen was
standing, talking with the nurse, or receptionist, whom she
obviously knew quite well.
"Joe, Karen will take you to one of the examination rooms,"
the nurse said.
Karen began walking down the hall, and Joe followed. When she
came to a door, she knocked, and when there was no answer, she
opened it and motioned for Joe to go inside. "Go in and have a
seat. I don't think this will take very long."
"What's going on?"
"Well, I think Dr. Roberts would like to examine you himself,"
Karen said. "I don't think it will be much, or take long." She
closed the door behind Joe, and he was alone in the room.
Great, he thought. Another examination. Since he had
undergone the change a week ago, Joe felt he had undergone more
physical examinations than he could remember. And they were very
different from what he was used to. It was bad enough to have to get
used to his new body, without persons prodding and probing it in
areas he was just learning he had. He looked around the small
room. The examination table was there, a little partition to
undress behind, and a door, probably a small room for a toilet. He
wondered if he should undress. Karen hadn't told him to, and he
certainly didn't want to go through the process if he didn't have
to. He just sat there, waiting for orders.
A quick knock on the door was followed by Dr. Roberts poking
his head in. He handed Joe a small plastic container. "There is
a restroom in there," he said, pointing to the door at the back of
the room. "Please fill this cup, and then remove your clothing.
There is a gown on the hook. I'll be with you in a few minutes."
He closed the door behind him.
Joe looked down at the little plastic cup in his hand. Sure,
fill this, he thought. Easy for you to say.
After almost a week of living with it, Joe was familiar with
urinating with his feminized genitalia. Feels like peeing with
your butt, he thought to himself the first time he did it. He had
never attempted to aim the urine stream as it came out. When he
first realized that he couldn't go as he always had, from a
standing position, he had automatically adapted what he considered
was the female, sitting, position. Of course it worked, you didn't
have to do anything but sit there and let it happen. But now, he
had to pee into this tiny cup. How would he do that? He went into
the small restroom. There was a stool in there, a sink, and a
mirror, nothing else. He would have to get the skirt and the
pantyhose off. Maybe he should he undress first.
Joe went back out into the examination room, and looked behind
the dressing curtain. There were hangers for his clothes. He put
the cup on a little stand and began to unbutton his blouse. He
slipped it off, carefully placed it on a hanger, then kicked off
his shoes. As Linda had showed him, he spun the skirt around to
the side, and then easily unzipped it. He stepped out of the
little skirt and then pulled the slip over his head. He felt the
chill of the room as he stood wearing only the bra, panty hose and
panties. Joe carefully removed the sheer hose, being careful not
to snag it with his fingernails. A quick flick on the clasp
between his breasts and his bra lay with the hose. He then pulled
the panties down his legs, examining the short, matted hair which
covered his greatly changed genitalia. His appearance was all
still new to him, and every time he saw himself, the way he was
now, he just had to look. He tossed his underpants with the bra,
and slowly ran his hand between his legs, feeling the damp hair,
enjoying his own touch. No time for fooling around now, he thought
to himself.
Joe took the short hospital gown and put his arms through the
sleeves, and attempted to tie the little strings behind his back.
Luckily, there were also small velcro tabs, and he satisfied
himself with rubbing two of those together, which at least kept the
little gown from opening in back and falling off, not that it
covered much but his boobs anyway. Joe found that his butt was
exposed, and though the fabric covered his front, if he happened to
sit down, his bottom would certainly be exposed. What the heck, he
decided, they're going to be looking at all that stuff anyway. He
picked up the plastic cup, went into the restroom, and from habit,
shut the door.
Joe eyed the cup, and went over to the toilet. He stood in
front of the stool like a guy, holding the cup below his crotch.
No, I don't think so, he considered, and spread his legs apart,
attempting to straddle the stool. Holding that position, he
positioned the cup between his legs, in the approximate spot he
guessed the pee would come out. He wasn't exactly sure where that
spot was, however. He tried to relax his muscles, in an attempt to
start the urine flow. Nothing would come. He was just too
nervous. He tried to think about something else, but it was almost
impossible. What a strange position for a guy to be in he
thought, and started to giggle. Jay would probably die laughing if
he could see him like this.
Holding the cup with one hand, Joe rubbed the area around his
clitoris. Although the tissues which were now his clitoris still
felt amazingly similar to the tip of his penis, though much more
sensitive, it had none of the sensations his penis had when he used
that to pee. Now of course, his urinary opening was located much
farther down, sort of between what had become the inner lips of his
vaginal area. To Joe, it still felt somewhat like the shaft of his
penis, or maybe his scrotum. It was hard to be definite, the nerves
in the area seemed to sort of blend. Sometimes now, he
could feel a slight burning sensation from there as he urinated,
and he could tell that was where the pee was coming from.
Using the fingers of one hand, Joe separated the folds which
formed the lips of his vulva, attempting to expose the opening of
his urethra. He rubbed around the area where he figured it would
be, and could feel the little bump with his finger near the bottom
of his pubic bone. He could certainly tell when he touched the
right spot. Keeping his lips spread apart as well as he could, he
held the cup to his crotch, and again tried to relax. This time he
felt the urine start to come, and was ready to reposition the cup
if his guess was wrong. As the warm flow arrived, it trickled into
the cup, over his fingers, and to his dismay, a small amount even
ran down his leg. He carefully moved his fingers around in an
attempt to get it all to go only into the cup.
Joe finally captured about half a cup full, and decided that
it was probably enough. His bladder was empty, in any case. He put
the cup down, grabbed some toilet paper and quickly wiped the
wetness from his hands and legs. After carefully drying off, he
threw the wet tissue into the toilet in disgust. There just had to
be a better way to do this. Women couldn't possibly have this much
difficulty doing this, could they? He would ask Linda, if he could
think of a way to bring up the subject. All cleaned up, Joe took
the cup back out and placed it on the work stand. He then sat
on the edge of the examination table, to wait for the embarrassment
which he knew was to come.
He had been sitting for about ten minutes, at least it seemed
that long, when there was a knock on the door. Before Joe could
answer, Dr. Roberts poked his head in.
"Are you ready to go?" Dr. Roberts asked.
"Ready as I'll ever be." Joe replied. He wasn't looking
forward to any of this.
Dr. Roberts entered the room, and went over to the stand. He
looked at the sample, then turned and looked at Joe. He had a
little device with a light on the end that Joe recognized was used
to examine ears and eyes. He came over to where Joe was now
standing next to the examination table. "Dr. Krell and Dr. Schwab
will be here soon. Just relax."
"That's easier to say than do," Joe said, smiling nervously.
"Yeah, I guess it is," Dr. Roberts said. "I imagine it is a
little hard to get used to all this."
"That's sure an understatement."
Dr. Roberts took the light, and peered into Joe's eyes,
shining the light into his pupils. Joe wondered what he was
looking for, and asked.
"Oh, nothing really." Dr. Roberts answered. It's just routine
when checking on a patient to check the eyes. I guess you might
say they're sort of a window to the brain."
"Oh yeah? And how does my brain look?"
"Do you think there's a problem with it?" Dr. Roberts asked,
grinning.
"I don't know." Joe said truthfully. "I know there sure have
been some strange thoughts in there the last few days."
"I'll bet," Dr. Roberts replied. "I guess this must be hard
to take. I mean, I haven't seen you any other way, and you look
perfectly normal to me, but of course, you are actually a man. At
least, you were." He smiled.
"Yeah. I really was. Now, I don't know what I am. Some-
times, I still feel like I'm still a guy. Believe it or not, I can
actually forget what I look like now," Joe went on. "But just
moving around, or have something touch me, then it's all back
again. Of course, I guess it isn't really that bad though.
Actually, sometimes, maybe even most of the time lately, I guess I
like being this way. Is that weird? I don't know if my brain is
changing, too, but it's starting to feel sort of normal, even good.
Do you have any idea what I'm trying to say?" He looked at the
doctor, who had a puzzled look on his face.
"Well, I'm trying to understand. As far as I know, there have
never been any other cases like yours. You guys are writing new
chapters in the books," Dr. Roberts said.
There was another quick knock, and Dr.'s Krell and Schwab came
in followed by Karen, who was now wearing a white nursing outfit.
Dr. Krell was talking with Dr. Schwab.
"Yes, and the hormone levels are different each time we
check," Dr. Krell said. Dr. Schwab only rubbed his chin thought-
fully.
Dr. Krell greeted everyone, and then looked at Joe. "Joe,
would you remove that gown for a moment and show these doctors just
what has happened to you?"
Feeling a flush come to his face, Joe reached behind his back,
and pulled the velcro apart, letting the little gown slip down his
arms. He lay it on the table, and stood naked in front of the
three doctors and Karen.
"There seems to be normal skeletal and breast development,"
Dr. Schwab said. "And you say this all occurred overnight?"
"That's what was reported," Dr. Krell answered. "One of the
others, Mike, seemed to develop secondary characteristics much more
slowly."
They were talking about him and his condition as if he wasn't
even in the room. Joe wondered if there was a reason for acting in
this detached way. He had noticed it before. When two or more of
them would get into a discussion, they seemed to ignore him, even
if he was there and could hear everything being said. It was a
strange, somewhat degrading thing for him to experience, as if they
felt he was incapable of comprehending what was they were talking
about.
"You can put the gown back on," Dr. Krell said, "and then
please lie down on the table."
Joe quickly pulled the gown over his shoulders, and hopped up
on the table. Karen helped him get into position, and covered him
with a sheet.
Joe saw Dr. Roberts go to the cabinet and watched him retrieve
a dreaded speculum. The doctor held the metal ends in his surgical
gloved hands to warm them.
Joe waited in expectation for what was to happen.
In a moment he felt the sheet being pulled back, exposing his
bottom. He felt someone touching him, examining his external
genitalia. Dr. Krell began talking.
"As you see, there appears to be scar tissue surrounding the
clitoris. It seems to be more exposed than is typical. From
questioning, I discovered that he was subjected to circumcision as
an infant. That is perhaps the source of the scar tissue."
As he was heard Dr. Krell speak, Joe could feel someone
examining that part of his body. Then he felt his lips being spread
apart. He wondered if Dr. Krell would notice the change in his
hymen. If he did, he wasn't saying anything.
Joe heard a metallic clicking sound, and then felt the strange
sensation of something being inserted into his crotch. Unlike the
last time, it went in easily, and wasn't really uncomfortable like
before. When he felt the device spread his vaginal opening, he did
feel some minor discomfort, but it wasn't bad, and he tried to take
his mind off of it by listening to what they were saying.
"Amazing. It all appears perfectly normal." He heard Dr.
Roberts say. "There is normal distention of the cervix, and the
upper vagina is fully developed. Have you performed a CAT scan?"
"Certainly," Dr. Krell answered. "Completely normal in
appearance... for a biological female."
"Have any of them experienced menses?"
"No. Not yet, but I expect it to happen."
The speculum collapsed and was withdrawn. Joe had to fight
the urge to reach over the sheet and rub his crotch. Dr. Krell
spoke to him again. "You can clean up and get dressed now, Joe."
The doctors left the room. Karen stayed and helped Joe,
taking the sheet away. As soon as she did, Joe put his legs down
and spun around, sitting on the edge of the table.
"You can wipe off with these," Karen said. She didn't leave
the room, but watched as Joe wiped the traces of K-Y jelly from his
genitalia. Having someone watch him do something so personal was
embarrassing, and Joe wondered why Karen was doing it. He quickly
finished, and went over to his clothes to dress.
"I was watching when they examined you," Karen said. "You
really are female, aren't you?"
"What did you think? That they were making it all up?" Joe
replied. "Of course I am. I thought you watched the last time."
"I was there, but I didn't really look that closely. Now I
know you better, and know more about you. I guess the real facts
of just what has happened to you guys just hit home."
Joe looked at the big friendly nurse and grinned. "It hit
home for me last Friday. I guess I'm getting used to it now."
Joe pulled his underwear up, and put the bra back on. His
firm breasts didn't really need the support, but he somehow felt
better with it on. He could now put it on without even thinking
about it. Much had changed in only a few days. Joe sat in a
chair, and pulled the pantyhose on, then the slip, and then he put
the outerwear on. When he was dressed, he looked in the mirror,
and straightened his hair. Throughout it all, Karen watched in
silence. When Joe was ready to leave the room, she spoke.
"You are so attractive, I find it hard to believe you were a
guy," she said. "I wish something like that could have happened to
me. I have to admit, I'm feeling a little jealous of you."
"But you're a woman now, too," Joe said, referring to Karen's
gender reassignment surgery. "And you're certainly good looking.
What is there about me to be for you to be jealous about?"
"I may look like a woman, but you ARE one. You heard Dr.
Krell. He expects that you'll menstruate. I'll never be able to
do that." Karen lamented.
"Well, I don't know if I would be envious of that," Joe said.
Of course, even as he spoke the words, he knew that the ability to
become a mother was an important part of being female. That
element of his condition was only recently becoming something he
could bear to think about.
"Just don't ever forget how lucky you are, Joe Bates," Karen
said, and went out the door.
Before he went out Joe looked at himself in the mirror one
last time, and thought about what Karen said. He adjusted the
hairpiece, and wondered about Karen. He had never seen her act this
way. Apparently, she was not as happy with her situation as she
appeared. He felt sorry for her. Maybe his changed body didn't
match his brain either, but he was finding that he was enjoying it
more every day. Maybe his brain had changed too, and the only
things about him that were still masculine were his memories. He
knew one thing, he sure wouldn't want to change his body back to
male surgically, that was certain. In fact, he didn't know if he
would want to go back, no matter how easily, or completely the
doctors might make it.
Joe went into the waiting area and took a seat. Apparently,
each of the others had been called too, and were in the examination
rooms. He had been the first. He sat there about five minutes,
before Mike came out and took a seat next to him.
At first Mike didn't say anything, but then he looked at Joe
and asked, "Did you have to pee into a cup?"
Joe looked at Mike and grinned. "It was a bitch, wasn't it?"
Mike asked, "How are we supposed to do that now?"
"Don't ask me. I'm going to ask Linda about it, if I can
figure a way to bring it up."
"There must be an easier way. I mean, the damn stuff seems
to come out all over," Mike went on. He had apparently tried
something like Joe did. Both former men were quickly learning how
to live with a feminized body.
Soon all the others came out too, and when they were all out
there, Karen came out. Dr. Krell followed her. He spoke. "We are
finished with you. Thank you for your patience. I'll see you all
at nine tomorrow, at Honeybone."
Karen looked at Joe. "I'll call you tonight. I have to stay
and work this afternoon."
"But your car is over at Honeybone," Joe retorted.
"I know. Dr. Krell will drop me off to pick it up later."
They all left the hospital. Joe wondered if he should return
to Honeybone, or if he should go home. He decided to go home,
stopping at his apartment before going to Linda's.
Joe drove to his apartment. He parked in the lot, and went up
the walk, stopping at his stuffed mailbox before going to his door.
He got his key from his small handbag, and went inside.
It had been days since he had last been there, and he felt a
certain familiarity when he entered the room. He put the stack of
bills, magazines and junk mail on the table, and went to set the
thermostat to a more comfortable temperature. He had turned it up
when he left, and it was very stuffy now.
Joe went to his bedroom, looking, seeing all the things of his
male world. He realized that even though he was starting to get
accustomed to his situation, he was beginning to miss the more
carefree life of a single male. He wanted to find Jay and play a
game of racquetball. Sure he could still do that, but it was
different now. Maybe, after the other night, a lot different.
Stepping into his walk-in closet, Joe saw the clothes hanging
there. Clothes he might never wear again. Along with the change
he had experienced, he was now an inch or two shorter although he
hadn't measured, and of course, his shape was very different. His
trim, muscular, masculine body had metamorphosed to a feminine
softness. It was still trim, but during the last week Joe had
acquired the light layer of fat under his skin that makes females
so soft. That, his changed skeletal structure, his hips were a bit
wider, his shoulders narrower, and a still decreasing upper body
muscle mass, made him look much different now. If he even tried,
his male clothing would just hang on him.
Suddenly Joe was overcome with emotion. He wasn't sure what
caused it. He just felt a flush come to his face, and tears well
in his eyes. He went over to his bed, lay down, and put his arms
over his eyes. What was happening to him? He could tell that
something, hormones or the changes in his brain, he didn't know,
was making him feel more emotional now. He had noticed it often,
it was often very difficult to avoid tears now, usually for what he
considered were the most trivial things. It must be part of being
female, he considered. At home alone now, he had no reason to hide
his emotions, and he began to sob. The tears ran down his face,
and he knew that he was messing up his face. Too bad, he thought,
I'm just going to let this one go, and not even try to stop it.
Was this what it was to be like from now on, breaking into tears
for the smallest things? He didn't know if he would ever really
get used to acting like this. He wished he could go to sleep, and
wake up with his male body, and brain, again. Maybe for just a
day. Yeah, that would be great. He'd call Jay, they'd maybe go
flying for an hour, and then go to the club and play a few games.
Yeah. He just wanted to sweat, to feel like a guy again. He rubbed
his hand across the softness of his breasts. Sure, it was kind of
interesting, even fun sometimes, being a girl, but he knew that
still, down deep, he was still really a guy. He realized that he
longed to do things like a guy again. Maybe he really should call
Jay. Jay always had an idea. Some of them were even pretty good.
Joe looked at the time. It was almost three thirty. Jay
would still be at his office, probably. He reached for the phone
and picked up the handset. Should he dial? He lingered for a
moment, then dialed the number for Jay's office. His secretary
answered, and he asked for Jay, using his own name when the
secretary asked who was calling. Jay's secretary knew Joe as a
man, but she didn't recognize his feminine voice. Too bad, Joe
thought, she might as well get used to it, if this was how it was
going to be from now on. Finally, Jay came to the phone.
"Hi Joe. What can I do for you?" he asked cheerfully.
"God, Jay, I'm sorry to be calling you at work." Joe said,
sniffling and rubbing his nose with his hand. "I just had to talk
with you... with somebody."
"What's the matter, Joe?" Jay asked. He could tell that
something was wrong. It sounded like Joe was crying. His friend's
now soft, feminine voice was more husky than normal.
"I don't know. I don't know. I'm just getting so tired of
all this female stuff all day long," Joe answered. "I just have to
get back on some familiar ground. I didn't know what to do, so I
called you."
Jay wondered what was happening with his best buddy. He
seemed to be handling it all so well.
"What do you want me to do, Joe?" He asked.
"When will you be getting through for the day?" Joe asked. "I
was wondering if you'd want to get some hood time?"
Joe was Jay's instructor, and Jay was working on his instru-
ment ticket.
"Fly? Well, yeah, I guess I could get away, maybe in an
hour," Jay answered. "Where are you? I'll pick you up."
"I'm at my apartment now." Joe said. "But I have to go change
clothes at Linda's. None of the stuff here will fit me anymore."
"Ok. I'll pick you up at Linda's. Say, in little over an
hour?"
"Ok. I'll be ready. Thanks Jay. Thanks a lot."
"No problem Joe... for you... anytime. In an hour." He hung
up the phone.
Joe hung up the handset. He had done it. He was meeting Jay,
and they would go flying. That would take his mind off all this.
Or would it? He thought about Jay, how they had been together only
a few nights ago. They had slept together... made love... it
wasn't... it couldn't ever be like it was before. He could even
tell by the way Jay talked to him... sort of gentle or something.
Jay would never have acted like that before. And why did he insist on
picking Joe up? He had never done that before. They had always
driven their own cars to the airport. Now, Jay wanted to come over
and pick him up. He hadn't thought about it while on the phone,
but it seemed a little strange now, as he thought about it. Joe
bent his knees, and in doing so saw his shiny, hairless, hose
covered legs, and the short little skirt he was wearing. Could he
really blame Jay for treating him like a girl? Wasn't that really
what he really was now?
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